Love Anyway

How do we bring ourselves to “love our neighbor” when we live in a world where bad things happen to good people? Sometimes anger and hatred prevail over the kinship and kindness we have discussed over the last two weeks. Why? And what can we do about it?

My campus ministry director at home has a friend, Father C, who has an incredible experience to share that may shed some light on loving our neighbors. Father C tells a story of profound forgiveness in the wake of a tragedy involving two families from the parish where he grew up. A boy and a girl were in a car together, the boy driving recklessly with the girl in the passenger seat. The car crashed, Liz died on impact, and Matt lived for two days in the hospital before also passing away.

According to Father C, “the parish was being torn apart.” Liz’s funeral was packed with standing room only: family, friends, and all the kids from their neighborhood crowded into the church to show their support and love and to grieve for Liz. Two days later, at Matt’s funeral, the church was almost empty, “likely out of anger, confusion, and fear.” Despite everything that had happened over the past week, Liz’s father saw a need for support and forgiveness that he could provide. He entered the empty church, sat behind Matt’s parents, and simply said, 

“We have both lost children. May I pray with you?”

This is the sort of radical, healing, faith-based forgiveness we are challenged to embrace and to live out ourselves, even when it seems like the most difficult response at times.

The opening lyrics of the song “We Walk By Faith” read: “We walk by faith, and not by sight.” The notion that “seeing is believing” is often a popular viewpoint in today’s society. We are drawn in by the material, the tangible. But a life of faith, a life of hope, means daring to follow Jesus without having the opportunity to touch his wounds or witness him pass through locked doors, as the first disciples did after his Resurrection.

We are urged to take a risk by humanity’s standards by trusting in the forgiveness that Jesus preached and lived out. After all, forgiveness doesn’t get more radical than this: after the Resurrection, Jesus revealed himself as the crucified Son of God to the very humanity who watched him die by showing the disciples his wounds, but even before that, he said, “Peace be with you” (John 20:19-20). And then he took, blessed, broke, and shared bread with them. Unconditional forgiveness.

Though it is often challenging and sometimes seems impossible, forgiveness is the choice ultimately made in faith. We are called to “love anyway.”